Days have passed since I last posted, and the reason is very simple I was very confused what to write.
Well lets be simple, she left him (again) and was feeling very bad about that, as always I was the supportive friend.
Let me tell you one thing ones of the hardest things in life is to see the woman you love cry for another man.
And again she told me how wonderful I am, how good she feels when I'm around and blablabla.
But the only thing that prevents our comeback is the physical part, don't get her wrong, she's talking about kissing her, she said that she can't imagine kissing me.
I said, please fulfill my ego, and I kissed her from all my heart, my heart almost stopped, it was Sunday the 8th of April at 19:18.
Do you know what was her reaction, she said who am I kidding, it's you that I love...
So I felt WOW, OMG, YEY. Her color changed and she was acting like it was the greatest day of her life.
I asked her to get back together, she asked for two days, I promised her that she can have her time (yeah right).
On Monday I couldn't wait anymore so I called her at 18:18 well to my surprise, she said that she wants to spend sometime alone (great).
On Tuesday I tried my luck one more time, I called at 19:18, the same answer came again, and she offered to be my friend and support me like I did with her, my answer to that offer was, I was there for you cuz I love you and I can't see you hurt, why do u want to support me?
So I thanked her (again) and told her to forget my name (again)....
The questions are:
- Do I really want her back?
- Is she abusing me?
- Can I know she is suffering without helping her?
- Does she love me?
- Can I live with a person that doesn't love me?
- Am I a TroubledSoul or a DumbSoul?
9 comments:
Oh fOr crying Out lOud!...yOu knOw what? Fuck it i have nOthing further tO say...all my faith in yOu just spiral dOwn tO that blackhOle yOu like tO circle arOund...
the Only persOn that can fix this is yOu...yOu can write abOut it and hear/read us try tO resOlve it Or cOnsOle yOu and yOu play alOng with us and make us seem like we made sense but...whatever...(i give up! my hands are up in the air) i'll gO tO lebanOn give yOu a hug and drOwn yOu along with ur misery!...
xOxO
j
She's alive......She's alive......
Jess is alive......... :P
stop promising me those hugs......
I'm getting sooooooo excited......
No really, to be honest I can't resist it when she calls me and says she's feeling down, or she's sad.
Anyway, for the 10th time, :P , this time it's over..... :D
No really, as u said it has to end someday. and I think it ended. I feel that...
yOu're like a brOken recOrd...maybe yOu need tO listen to Gin BlOssOms...lOl!
well i wOn't be surprise if One day after yOu have repeatedly tOld urself its Over-that we humble peOple Of the blOgOsphere are gOing tO read anOther episOde Of ur hOstel-like-dramatic/tragic/masOchistic/suicidal lOve affair...and i'm just gOnna sit here and bite my nails when it happens and then i'll send yOu my dOg he can give yOu a hug!
Is he a he or a she? Ur dog :P?
a HE...wOuld it make any difference if my dOg is a SHE?
i mean c'mOn are yOu OntO dOggies nOw?
lOl!
it's better than my own hand....... omg this subject has drifted..... :S
The girl is being a ... girl. There are no rules to this game. If there were you wouldn't follow them anyway.
Common sense tells me there is absolutely no way you can win with her; not in the long term. And yet... who knows?
Everyone knows what you should do. Everyone's a great commander watching battle from the distance.
One thing... It's better to feel pain than to feel nothing at all.
Unfortunately you've been relegated to friend status.... to be blunt, you're fucked
(actually make that "unfuckable")
It's pointless even trying, you'll never be anything more now. :(
If you try to remain friends it will be a constant struggle for you to maintain control over your emotions.
But we're guys right! Fuck being rational over a pretty girl we decide is something special!
I shouldn't give advice, we've all done it. :P
I believe that men are more sensitive than women, (Jess :P).
@shlemazl
Common sense tells me there is absolutely no way you can win with her; not in the long term.
Knowledge is one thing, but acceptance is another :(
@Chris
It's pointless even trying, you'll never be anything more now
100% agree but when I start really following my own rules, I'll stop trying :P pretty confusing right.... :D
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