Fictional Life

I've lost hope
No more ways
No more feelings
So today will be the birthday
Of my fictional friends
Of my second life
That neither exist
Nor likely to exist
In that life I'll be
In that life I'll do
What I wasn't, what I didn't
With E
My friends will be what I missed
With E
I'll even have a girlfriend
That I wish will represent
To E what SJ represented to me
Will she be hurt?
I don't think so
If she will
Why is she still with him
I hope not
I don't want to hurt her anymore
I just her to get rid of that pity for me
I just want to tell her
That I have a life without her
Like her
I'm very happy without her
Like her
I'm not waiting her
Like her
That's why I called it a fictional life
That neither exist
Nor likely to exist